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Bottoming from the center – building to the top

Setting the table is a fitting description for how many submissives attempt to get what they want without asking.

The concept is creating a pleasing environment for the D, so they either seek to reward the submissive or are simply more likely to be in a playful mood.

So why not simply ask?

Many submissives feel that if they present their desires to the D, that they are projecting their wishes and are – the dreaded – topping from the bottom.

Often a D will ask the sub what they want, what would make them happy, the intention is easily misunderstood, Where the submissive fears that the D is simply conforming to the sub’s wishes, or taking a shortcut to appease them, it’s likely that the D wants to know what they are doing that is not pleasing their s type.

Similarly, a D can be equally reluctant to ask what they can do differently, unwilling to change course out of principle or insecure about the sub’s indifference to their preferred form of Dominance.

The analogy of setting the table is a good one for finding a balance and middle ground where D and s can meet to balance out their needs. One or they other can invite their partner to help ‘set the table’ either by asking simple questions like ‘What tool would you like to be beaten with today’ or ‘which outfit can i wear for you today?’

These panties are held by a small ring at the center, it not adjusted just right, the straps will pull one way or another making it impossible to balance and hold the needs of my delicate penis.

That’s what makes these panties special 😉

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