Beginners Guides

A Beginner’s Guide to Butt Plugs

This guide is designed to give you the basics of what to look for in a butt plug, mistakes to avoid, and helpful suggestions for ensuring success in discovering the joy of plugging up your butt.

It is important to have real toys

Here’s what to look out for and why:

A flared base on any anal toy is extremely important and for a much more important reason than just holding that cute decorative heart shape that sparkles in the light, flashing your desire to those you wish to see it. I know, this might sound crazy but let’s take a look at a few things before we cover the real reason.

First off let’s take a little time to explain how the different parts of your bum work so we are all starting on the same page. Just inside the opening of your anus is the sphincter which is actually two separate rings.

The outer sphincter is one that can be controlled consciously to some extent, at least relaxing it and tightening it. The inner sphincter, another muscular ring of sensitivity that’s main job is to stay closed and does so subconsciously although it can be manipulated by pressure from either direction causing it to relax. Past these rings is your prostate, located on the stomach side of your anal canal. For further details on the anus here is a good link

Now that we finished with a brief overview of the area of concern let’s look at the reasons why a plug has that larger base and briefly discuss the overall shape of your standard butt plug. Beginning at the top most plugs have a rounded smaller surface that is designed to slip into your bum, slowly and with lube of course, and then gradually apply pressure to your sphincter rings letting them know to open up.

As a piece of advice these rings will relax easier if you are relaxed in turn. As the rounded tip gently persuades the outer and then inner ring to relax and open your plug will begin to slide in without much pressure. The rounded tip may slip past your prostate giving you a wonderful jolt of juicy pleasure but most likely it will only apply some light pressure to this area as it then rests safely inside your anal canal.

The bulb of the plug will stretch your sphincters nicely typically as it passes before they will wrap around the smaller neck of the plug, very effectively holding it in place. At this point the immensely important base is snuggled up between your tight cheeks and we are to the point of our original question, the purpose of the base. Without the flared base your body would close the sphincter rings, unconsciously propelling the plug further inside and closing behind it.

That lovely flared base prevents it from going in further than designed and your amazing body locks it in place from slipping out. Ta da! We have unraveled the answer to the mysterious base of the soon to be new favorite toy.

Size does matter

There are a lot of toys out there in many shapes and sizes:

Size does matter when choosing the right butt plug, it all depends on the pleasure, purpose, and pressure you are looking for.

If you’re a beginner I suggest a small slender probe toy at first. These are about the size of fingers and inexpensive and will give you an idea if you will enjoy it. I don’t recommend these for long term wear as they might get lost inside.

You can buy a beginners set that will have various sizes in plugs. These are designed for play and use long term wear.

Using anal beads of various sizes to get a feel for the size is a great way to find the right size plug to huy. The gradual increase in size will help judging the correct girth and length for comfort.

Don’t jump to the XXXL “holy Mary mother if God size”.  Starting with something to big can turn you off of anal play. If you are experienced then smaller slender girths and lengths won’t be pleasurable for you.

Length also is important. The anus twists and turns. You have to manipulate the larger ones more and these can miss the pleasure spots if you just ram it in.

Girth is most important. You have some that will expand inside giving more pleasure. As always keep it safe and go with what you are comfortable with.  If you’re satisfied with a small slender toy or a large “crying out loud monster” it is about your pleasure.

What plugs are out there?

Suggestions on the best plugs to buy:

Everybody is different and therefore preferences differ as. These are based on my opinions on if i was asked what would be “the best”, this is where i would tell them to start. As always use lots of lube, a good rule is when Y/youve thought Y/you have used enough, double it! Anal play such as butt plugs shouldnt hurt while inserting them, there might be a little discomfort but “pain” shouldnt be there.

Beginner Plugs:

Ive attached 2 links for 2 plugs that i would recommend for beginners. Both are inexpensive, quality materials and a good plug for starters to explore and see if they want to move on to something bigger. Neither are aggressive, intimidating, both easy to hold onto and can be used a plug to lube up for intermediate play.

This one  is 1.15” at the widest point. Has a long, small neck on it and the T shape which is easy to hold in. I feel as ther T shaped bases adapt to the anatomy better and are more comfortable for longer wear. I would use this one for beginners and as a plug to use before using the next one ive listed below.

Tantus makes good products that i can vouch for. Its diameter is 1.3”, it has a nice small neck and has enough flare to it to be able to hold in for beginner. The neck is also longer and the base extends well past the widest point. Tantus plugs are soft yet have a firm core.

Intermediate Plugs:

For those who want to explore plugs that are a little wider, little heavier but still are easy to hold in and comfortable for longer term wear…..

At almost 1.5 inches wide, its nice and fulfilling, giving you that little “stretch” that we like. Has a nice size to it, isnt to long, still able to move around with it and it retains that smaller and longer neck and T base.

I don’t have any experience with these but the reviews are wonderful. Right at 1.5” (medium) at the widest point, the rubber tubing allows the user to accept the plug and “grasp” it without pulling it in due to the base. Has a nice weight to it to that will remind the wearer that its there yet remain comfortable.

To add some vibration to it, The Lovense remote controlled plug is great. Strong vibrations that will rumble through you, has bluetooth capability so a user from across the globe has the ability to control it. Mine is the large at 1.75”, it has a nice feel going in and really locks in place due to the small neck and flare.

I have this one and i love it! Its been awhile since ive taken it but at 1.9” at the widest point, it takes a bit to get it in but once its in, it feels great. The feeling of the widest point sliding in and finally taking the entire plug is wonderful. Is great for long term wear, youll know its there with the wide base but the plug itself is nice and  comfortable. Also have the jock strap that goes with it, has a nice feel to it when wearing both. This is about the widest im comfortable going.

Anal Sluts (Advanced Plugs):

This is something i don’t have any experience with with from what i’ve read and seen, they want the feeling of really being “stretched” open with the plug and the neck.

With a range from 1.3” in diameter to 3.5”, its cover all the bases. The neck is almost as large as the plug so i would assume it would be hard to hold in on your own. If you wanna be stretched open wider and wider then these would be great for that.

These have good reviews and people seem to like them. At 2.10” and opens to 4”, it will open up and hold itself in place.

For those that want that “all day” feeling, a locking harness that your Domme can lock onto you and send you on your way. 1.5” at the smallest and pumps up to 3.5”.

Different Type of Butt Plugs for Different Occasions

Butt plugs come in all shapes and sizes which can be very overwhelming when you first start out. which one do i try first? will it be suitable for a beginner? what style is the best? what material should i go for?

There are tonnes or factors to look into that will narrow down your search and bring you to that end result and the perfect plug for you. i will hopefully raise some light on some activities you can do with butt plugs and my preferences for them.

Anal stretching:

Now i love a good stretching out, but i personally haven’t got a good collection of butt plugs that do the trick yet, i did however come across this set which looks spectacular.

This set of 5 anal dilators covers a great range of diameter starting from a kind and easy 3.25 inches long, 1 inch in diameter and 3 inches in circumference. Then all the way up to 5 inches long, 2 inches in diameter and 6.25 inches in circumference. These are a great starter set to stretching and easing your body into that gradual progression without having to deal with finding those in between plugs to get you to that next step you wish to achieve. These will take you all the way up to some of those larger more intimidating butt plugs that you love the look of, but fear.

Long term wear:

i have some experience myself with long term wear with butt plugs and made it up to about 7 hours of being constantly plugged. i did notice something during my attempts along the way, you definitely need a good flexible plug especially if you are active, as it can cause some discomfort otherwise. with that being said i came across this plug on my endeavors.

Now this plug mayl likely be to wide for your first experience into long term wear. however there are many other plugs just like this one on this site. The main area i wanted to highlight was the anchor base, it’s very smooth and you will have absolutely no worries what the plug will somehow getting lost up there with this style base, the other perfect part is that its silicone, nice and flexible, the last thing you want is from the plug to be rigid especially when you are starting out.

Anal training:

For anal training when i first started out i only progressed with fingers as i wasn’t too keen on buying any toys yet, but as soon as i bought my first one i bought a lot more haha, i however ended up with toys i couldn’t use as my ambition got the best of me. i had this dildo that i wanted to work up to it was a bit thicker than i could take when starting out, so i bought myself a nice small dildo, i would warm up with my fingers and then use the dildo after i felt comfortable enough to do so. i continued this for about two weeks where i attempted the bigger dildo with much more success. The moral of the story is take it slow, have a goal in mind, put in the time and effort and you will get there just be safe, if it hurts stop, drop down a size then try again later.

Now these plugs are great for starting out, you don’t have to mess around with your fingers this way either. There are alot of anal training kits out there with all sorts of different shapes and sizes, my main tip would be keep it simple, you don’t want 4 different styles in the same kit, keep it uniform. The reason for this is you want a gradual increase of the same style as used before if you leap into an entirely different style of plug it can feel like your starting all over again.

The plugs here are nice slim flexible and have great tapered tips for easy insertion, and the best part you can still go bigger and eventually work your way to that dildo you have your eye on.

Full feeling:

For me that full feeling is when i am nicely stuffed, i don’t want more and i am not uncomfortable by any means, its noticable and will remind you that it is there the whole time you have it in.

i cannot recommend this butt plug enough for this exact feeling.

This plug has a nice length to it so it rests nicely inside, but the best part by far is that it;s slightly weighted which definitely adds to that full feeling that you want to achieve. What i learnt from using this particular one is that weighted is the way to go to achieve this feeling. If this is to big for yourself then they offer smaller variants of this plug. opening it up to a more wide variety of play which is nice. The exterior of the plug is so smooth and just feels great. the anchor base again taking away all worries of that plug getting lost. i cannot recommend this one in particular enough.

Getting the Plug in the Hole

After you have decided on the right butt plug and path you with to take, here are some simple instructions to getting the plug inside for the first time.

1. Have the right mood to attempt putting your plug in. You need to be in a proper state of arousal to make it an enjoyable experience.

2. The position, you are in when you want to insert it, is very important.

There are some i want to list here.


  • On your back, legs spread in the air
  • Standing up, one leg up
  • On your knees

With a partner:

  • On all fours
  • On your stomach, legs spread
  • On your knees on top of your partner

3. Lube up. Like literally lube as much as you can do. The butt doesn’t produce its own fluid so you have to do that. If you think you have used enough lube take even more and then you have the right amount.

If you want to apply it with your fingers you have to make sure your nails are trimmed.

4. Start with a smaller size first. You can always go bigger if you want but if you went overboard first and it doesn’t go in you most likely don’t want to start over again.

5. Take your time putting it in. It’s a slow process so plan some time in to play with your plug.

6. When the time comes to put it in finally you need to have the right grip. Make sure to hold both the base and the shaft for maximum control.

The base should be resting in the palm of your hand and hold the shaft with your index and middle finger and the tip of the plug pointing towards the anus.

The tip should be lower than the base so the angle is slightly downward.

If you do it like that you will have it easier once you try out bigger models.

7. If you managed to put it in, stop a second and listen to your body. Does it feel good or not? Maybe you need to adjust it a little by moving it. It’s not advised to sit on it for adjustments and if it hurts take it out as fast as possible.

8. Now that’s in comfortably you can start playing with it. Sliding out and in and going a little faster if you really like it. You can even go and try a larger plug size.

30 Day Anal Training Program

Below are downloadable 30 day programs with daily tasks to get you from an anal beginner to a regular butt hole sinner. Each guide has unique goals, choose the one that best suits your needs:

30 Day Beginner Butt Plug Program

30 Days to a Large Butt Plug Guide

30 Days to 24/7 Butt Plug Use

Do’s and Don’ts for Anal Sex Toys

There’s a right and a wrong way to use sex toys for anal training. Below is a list of recommendations for safe play with toys:


Make sure any toy has a flared base

Start with a smaller size than your ultimate desired goal if you have one

Cleanse yourself before starting to play

Realize for prostate massage it is only about 3 inches from the anus

Choose the right lube based on your toy’s material

Clean your toys after use by hand or if safe in dishwasher

Store in sealed container or box away from heat

Watch for signs or tearing or friction, if painful stop

Use your own toys, assuming others provide is rude and unsanitary


Don’t use your lube sparingly, you can’t have too much, but you can have too little

Don’t use water based lube for long term insertion as it evaporates quickly

Don’t try to force something much larger than you are used to

Don’t insert randoms, make sure your toys are safe, clean and won’t break off inside you

Don’t put electronic toys in the dishwasher or submerge if not properly sealed

Don’t use toys without permission as it can be damaging for others

Don’t use silicone lube with silicone toys, the toy’s surface will slowly degrade

Don’t force something in if the anus isn’t relaxed and ready

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